


Jungle Fever

by My_Trex_has_fleas



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: But also a con artist, Fili being a scaredy cat, M/M, Mornings, Other, Sexual Content, Vaccinations
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-05
Updated: 2015-09-05
Packaged: 2018-04-19 04:07:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,042
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4732259
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/My_Trex_has_fleas/pseuds/My_Trex_has_fleas
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kili wants to see the botos. Fili is playing hard to get.</p><p>This is a fill for the Summer Fandom Raffle Exchange Prompt No. 44 'Fine! I'll make you the goddamned pancakes!!'</p>
            </blockquote>





	Jungle Fever

Fili opened one eye and gave his brother a look that very clearly said that he was not getting up anytime soon.

‘No.’ he muttered and disappeared under the duvet again. Kili huffed and blew his hair out of his eyes.

‘You’re being a fucking child.’ he said, the exasperation clear in his voice. There was the sound of a very loud raspberry being blown at him under the duvet and then a giggle that no self-respecting thirty year old should have made. ‘For Christ’s sake, Fee. We had this appointment booked for weeks. We’re leaving in a month. You have to fucking go.’ 

‘I’m not the one who’s so hung up on seeing pink fucking dolphins that I’m dragging my brother to the middle of fucking nowhere.’ Fili’s voice was muffled.

‘Firstly, they are called botos and secondly you lost the game. You can’t be angry about me picking where we go on holiday when it was your idea to play rock, paper, scissors for it in the first place. Thirdly, if you hadn’t been a smug bastard about your so called winning streak, I might even have forgone the fucking botos, but no. You really only have yourself to blame.’ He sighed as the lump under the duvet refused to move. ‘Come on, one little prick and it’ll be all over.’ 

‘Fuck you, Kee. It’s not the little prick that’s bothering me, although he is being very fucking annoying right about now.’ Fili snickered at his own joke and Kili had to physically restrain himself from going over and kicking him in the balls. ‘It’s the big fucking needle they’re going to stick in my arse.’

‘It’s not that bad.’ Kili sai. He’d been for his vaccination two days before and while it had made his arse ache for a couple of hours, he was in no way bothered by it. But then, he didn’t have the nearly pathological fear of needles that his big brother did. And Fili was as stubborn as the day was long. This called for desperate measures.

‘I tell you what.’ he said, coming over the bed and sitting down. ‘If you’re good and get up, you can ask me to do anything for you.’ There was a suggestive tone to his last words. He knew he was playing dirty but, honestly, exchanging sexual favours for what he wanted was always a win-win situation. And Fili was always up for suggesting things. 

But apparently not this morning.

‘No.’ Fili said. ‘I’m only coming out for pancakes.’ Kili frowned. This had not taken the turn he’d expected it to.

‘Pancakes?’ he repeated, a little incredulous at the suggestion. ‘I’m basically giving you free rein to ask me to do anything for or to you and you’re asking me for pancakes?’

‘I feel like pancakes.’ There was a bit of movement and then the appearance of mussed blond hair and not-as-sleepy-as-he’d-made-out blue eyes over the edge of the duvet. ‘With lemon. And icing sugar.’

‘Oh for fuck’s sake.’ Kili snorted. ‘I don’t even have the stuff in the house we need to make you pancakes. How about a blowjob instead?’

‘Pancakes, Killian.’ Fili said, his voice now stern. ‘Or no fucking deal.’

‘Jesus fucking Christ. Fine! I’ll make you the goddamned pancakes!’ Kili started to get up but a hand shot out from under the duvet, catching him by the wrist and pulling him down. Kili was taken by surprise, falling back onto the bed and then found himself being dragged under the duvet. He struggled half-heartedly as Fili got on top of him and pinned him down. He looked up into clear blue eyes which were now sparkling madly.

‘Now that I’ve got you to agree to making me pancakes, we can now negotiate the terms of your release.’ Fili was smiling and Kili started to drown in dimples. He managed to pull himself together enough to make a noise of protest.

‘No way. You asked for pancakes, you’re getting pancakes. If you wanted a fuck you should have asked for it.’ he said trying to push Fili off, but not trying so hard that he’d actually succeed. Fili chuckled low in his throat and Kili felt his resolve packing its suitcase and preparing to go on a long trip. Maybe to see some botos.

‘Are you telling me I can’t have both?’ Fili murmured into his neck, and Kili closed his eyes and tried to will his cock into submission. It didn’t work, especially when Fili started kissing his neck like that. 

‘Absolutely not.’ he said firmly, grabbing Fili’s hand and putting it on the offending appendage. ‘A deal’s a deal.’

‘If that’s the case, then what are you doing?’ Fili’s kisses had trailed to the other side of his neck now, and Kili thrust up into his brother’s hand.

‘Nothing.’ he said. ‘You’re clearly hallucinating. There is absolutely nothing going on here.’ He shoved both hands down the back of Fili’s pyjama pants and groped his backside, spreading his legs at the same time so Fili was more comfortably accommodated. It also meant that he could feel just how interested his brother was in their current activity. And when Fili kissed him, Kili found that it was very hard to resist opening his mouth and shoving his tongue into Fili’s, so he didn’t even bother trying. Fili made a noise that told Kili that he approved greatly of this new development, and reciprocated in kind. 

*********

An hour later, they were still in the same place. Only now their pyjamas were on the floor and there was a lot more heavy breathing going on. 

‘You know.’ Kili mused. ‘I think I just got conned.’He was on his back, the hair on his stomach matted with his own cum. He regarded it and then looked up at his brother who was still balanced over him, hands on either side of his body and his blond hair dark with sweat and hanging in his eyes. Fili gave him a beautiful smile and eased out of him before getting up off the bed and picking up Kili’s discarded t-shirt and chucking it at him. 

‘You think?’ he said in a smug voice and wandered into the bathroom.


End file.
